The bookmark was a piece of recycled cardstock, some dead independent bookstore's name on it in a sans-serif that had briefly been fashionable, and I kept it not from sentimentality, but from the specific inertia of a person who has decided to let objects make their choices for him.
The timing of this beautifully written post is extra meaningful to me. On Sunday I picked out a local history book that has been on my shelf a long time. I sat down to read, opened it and a treasure slipped out. It was a handwritten note from my mom. Dated March 2003. She mailed me the book after she read it and included the note. She wrote her favorable impressions of the book and added, “This is a must for your personal library.”
The book has been tucked on a shelf for 23 years. I hadn’t thought of it and didn’t remember the note. I’m so glad I’m reading it now. As I read along, I try to guess the passages that would have most impressed my mom, and the ones that made her laugh.
I am appreciating this book, “The Last Cracker Barrel,” by journalist Ernest Lyons, in ways I could not possibly have 23 years ago.
Who was the person who put that there? What were they waiting for? One gets older and the artifacts of your past life start to feel like they belong to someone you once heard about, someone you might have pitied or loved if you’d known them in the right light.
Yow! Given my ongoing excavation of such objects, this perfectly expresses conflicted feelings about past selves.
didn't paul auster write a book from a dog's perspective? i read that in a couple of sittings which is rare for me. i read slow these short attention span daze....i love the idea of returning to a previous version of myself. my mom has asked me a number of times to remember when i was in my early 20's and all the people i met and hung out with and then slowly, i slipped into hermit-ville and only now, very recently, began talking to strangers all the time again. Problem is that the world feels like a spirit war with forces pulling and tugging souls in different direction. It feels real, this war, not to the naked eye, but there, definitely there and it scares me but i don't want to live in fear. i want to walk down the street and be ready to either strike up a conversation or karate chop someone if need be, but i'm trying to decipher between people who belittle me and those who raise me up. change of topic but i keep getting alan watts and carl jung videos sent to me on you tube.....i guess it's all synchronized.
good timing. i've been on a sleepless binge mania spring cleaning which has included organizing my books and newspaper clippings and magazine articles and so i now can find anything in a matter of minutes. it's like a freaking little library i got. next thing is tossing away and donating old clothes. trying to get my apartment clutter free so i'm ready to run if the bullets start flying. anyway, the book is called TIMBUKTU and i enjoyed it enough to be looking for other Auster books. Such a great family name, so close to austere which is maybe what i'm trying to do to my apartment or maybe i'm just bored.
got some weed, but it's sativa and that makes me hyper and of course, when it's here as it usually is, i smoke it and stay awake. sometimes i wonder if the life of a monk making wine in the woods would be a nice alternative to being high all the time or maybe back and forth, seesaw cannabis and some kind of meditation. but heck if i can focus long enough to align with my breathing. one thing i've noticed is that spring around here ends the hibernation of spirits. it feels like a free for all out there, but i'm gonna brave it and go walking this afternoon. where were you when you read TIMBUKTU?
It was 2012 and I had just moved back to Los Angeles into a two story house with a bunch of musician/slacker roommates. I would meet my future girlfriend very soon thereafter and we would live together for 4 years. (that's also the same year I met a dude named Steve Myers)
2012 and we're still kicking . hot damn! four years seems about right when it comes to girlfriends and yet, i've been with mine (sounds like motown) for i'm not even sure how long?....been that long. almost 20 years. sometimes i think an ancient way might work out better....like how in the word can one woman satisfy a man? and one man satisfy a woman. one for sex. one for intellectual things and one for exercise and one for reflexology and so on.....i don't know. sometimes i think i should have been an over the road trucker. they're away from home all the time. less chance of a relationship getting stale.
WHAT!! Gary, this is beautiful.
thank you Carly Simon…you’re pretty darn beautiful yourself.
🙏
The timing of this beautifully written post is extra meaningful to me. On Sunday I picked out a local history book that has been on my shelf a long time. I sat down to read, opened it and a treasure slipped out. It was a handwritten note from my mom. Dated March 2003. She mailed me the book after she read it and included the note. She wrote her favorable impressions of the book and added, “This is a must for your personal library.”
The book has been tucked on a shelf for 23 years. I hadn’t thought of it and didn’t remember the note. I’m so glad I’m reading it now. As I read along, I try to guess the passages that would have most impressed my mom, and the ones that made her laugh.
I am appreciating this book, “The Last Cracker Barrel,” by journalist Ernest Lyons, in ways I could not possibly have 23 years ago.
I love that, Mark. She should also know that she raised a wonderful, cerebral and thoughtful person.
Love this. Auster was exactly this for me yet this feels very Bolaño
Hitting the library today, perfect time to polish up on Bolano. (and request your book)
Auster was everything to me at a young age. I suppose he still is.
Lovely. “…and what you thought was gone turns out to have only been waiting.” So much for my mind to crack open in that paragraph ♥️
🐵 (does this look like a monchichi)
😂
Who was the person who put that there? What were they waiting for? One gets older and the artifacts of your past life start to feel like they belong to someone you once heard about, someone you might have pitied or loved if you’d known them in the right light.
Yow! Given my ongoing excavation of such objects, this perfectly expresses conflicted feelings about past selves.
Such kind words Mark. I appreciate you reading and commenting. 📚🚬😌
Deep stuff man… I feel like your describing gnosis
Really loved this piece.
I appreciate you stopping by, Ruth. 🙂
Gary this knocked me on my ass. I love you.
Thank you Queenie 🫠
Beautiful. And incredibly relatable. Bookmarks are one of the few things that have survived moving across cities and oceans.
I appreciate your kind words Thomas. ⚾
So well described. I know that feeling well but never thought to articulate it this way. And what a tune.
Thanks Margaret. I just saw the band this past Friday night and it was excellent! 😀
They’re just great.
Yeah, I have a few of those bookmarks.
didn't paul auster write a book from a dog's perspective? i read that in a couple of sittings which is rare for me. i read slow these short attention span daze....i love the idea of returning to a previous version of myself. my mom has asked me a number of times to remember when i was in my early 20's and all the people i met and hung out with and then slowly, i slipped into hermit-ville and only now, very recently, began talking to strangers all the time again. Problem is that the world feels like a spirit war with forces pulling and tugging souls in different direction. It feels real, this war, not to the naked eye, but there, definitely there and it scares me but i don't want to live in fear. i want to walk down the street and be ready to either strike up a conversation or karate chop someone if need be, but i'm trying to decipher between people who belittle me and those who raise me up. change of topic but i keep getting alan watts and carl jung videos sent to me on you tube.....i guess it's all synchronized.
Did I miss that one? What is it called? I thought I had read everything by the man and I'm actually excited that perhaps I haven't.
good timing. i've been on a sleepless binge mania spring cleaning which has included organizing my books and newspaper clippings and magazine articles and so i now can find anything in a matter of minutes. it's like a freaking little library i got. next thing is tossing away and donating old clothes. trying to get my apartment clutter free so i'm ready to run if the bullets start flying. anyway, the book is called TIMBUKTU and i enjoyed it enough to be looking for other Auster books. Such a great family name, so close to austere which is maybe what i'm trying to do to my apartment or maybe i'm just bored.
Yes! I remember it well, and I remember exactly where I was when I read it.
P.S. get some sleep you lunatic. 😂 You got any weed?
got some weed, but it's sativa and that makes me hyper and of course, when it's here as it usually is, i smoke it and stay awake. sometimes i wonder if the life of a monk making wine in the woods would be a nice alternative to being high all the time or maybe back and forth, seesaw cannabis and some kind of meditation. but heck if i can focus long enough to align with my breathing. one thing i've noticed is that spring around here ends the hibernation of spirits. it feels like a free for all out there, but i'm gonna brave it and go walking this afternoon. where were you when you read TIMBUKTU?
It was 2012 and I had just moved back to Los Angeles into a two story house with a bunch of musician/slacker roommates. I would meet my future girlfriend very soon thereafter and we would live together for 4 years. (that's also the same year I met a dude named Steve Myers)
I love the idea of wine making recluse monks.
2012 and we're still kicking . hot damn! four years seems about right when it comes to girlfriends and yet, i've been with mine (sounds like motown) for i'm not even sure how long?....been that long. almost 20 years. sometimes i think an ancient way might work out better....like how in the word can one woman satisfy a man? and one man satisfy a woman. one for sex. one for intellectual things and one for exercise and one for reflexology and so on.....i don't know. sometimes i think i should have been an over the road trucker. they're away from home all the time. less chance of a relationship getting stale.
Brilliant post!
Much appreciated EE